A woman in abuse might not know it. 

You can help her understand that her relationship might be unhealthy (be careful using the word abuse). These questions are a good place to start (make sure to ask without judgment):

• Does it seem as though everything that goes wrong in your relationship is blamed on you?
• Do you feel nervous around your spouse but you can't put your finger on why?
• Does your mental sanity come up often?
• Did you relationship go from fairytale to nightmare?
• Are you criticized for everything you do?
• Do you feel like a different person than you were before you were married?